Tuesday, February 15, 2005, 9:01 PM
Straightened out my thoughts..
I guess i really like splurging on the ones i like.Heh,i'm not biased k...I bought roses for Yanqi,Adeline,Josy and gave Steph a sunflower.Made her a card too.Wanted to buy for Heng Jing and Jialing...But they left sch already.Yups.
I kept whining to everyone about how sad i was to go out wit 5 ppl on Val's Day.Cos i put in a lot of effort and not counting the money(its even more than what i got for my hongbao money).I guess i really felt damn low yest.After all,all i got was a perfume.I mean,yeah,i love the perfume..but i just wished he would have put in a lil more effort.Just a simple "I love you" card will do,or maybe even a stalk of Lily...I guess i expected too much from him...Considering the fact that he's a really insensitive guy.I'm not trying to be selfish here...I don't mind hanging out wit his friends on any other day...But come'on.Its Val Day.Can't we have some time to ourselves?Roob say"Everyday should be a Valentine's Day"..BUT its NOT larh!Everytime we also hang out wit them.Can't they make themselves disappear or sth after dinner...=( I mean they were funny and retarded larh..Made me laughed and all...but somehow,Valentine's Day really sucked larh.I almost wanted to break down and cry when i was out wit them in town...I felt really foolish.Why did i make sooo much effort and get so little out of it....I cried myself to sleep on Val day.Hmms.When i woke up,i guess we tried talking it out via sms..Anyways,i figured out that since i'm still unwilling to let go cos somehow i reallly like being wit him,i guess from now on,I wont expect much from him since he sais he's still healing form his last r/s..We'll just take it as it goes.If it works out,good den.If it doesn't,we'll still be friends.I've been super duper nice and tolerant towards him.Nicest ever.I kinda felt the way Marc feels when he used to tell me "Being nice to ppl won't get ya anywhere.They still treat you like shit"..
I tell myself-However he treats me,i'll treat him back the same.I think i'm gonna work part-time selling hps on weekends.First of all,i won't be so "clingy" towards him,i would be occupied whilst he spends his time wit his gfs Roob and Emily and i would get $$ to shop!=)
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